In The Arms of An Angel

Peter, our premature baby, developed breathing problems yesterday afternoon. He began gasping, and although he was working very hard to breathe, he just couldn't draw air down into his lungs. Babies who are born several weeks premature often do not produce surfactant, a substance that lubricates their lungs. As a result, their lungs become stiff and this makes it difficult for them to breathe.

For 12 hours, Nurse Claudia and I took turns breathing for Peter, using an ambu bag. All thorough the night, we marvelled at the phenomenal strength of this 2lb boy; flailing and trying to suck on his face-mask and fighting to breathe by himself the entire time.

This morning, at 6:15 after a long struggle, Baby Peter lost his battle for life and flew away from us, in the arms of an angel.

His Mother was not surprised. 'The earthquake shook my belly hard,' she said, in a thin, trembling voice, that told the story of a woman shaken to her very core. We have heard that in the aftermath of this disaster, scores of pregnant ladies delivered their babies prematurely. Many of their labours seems to have progressed very rapidly, and a number of these woman suffered major hemorrhages and died.

Peter is the second preterm infant that we have lost since last month's earthquake. We really had been hopeful that he would survive. He was so strong, and he had made such good progress in the week that he was with us. He overcame hypothermia, low blood sugars, and apnoea.

As Christians, we hold fast to a particular biblical passage; 'And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him,' (Romans 8:28). We trust that God sees things that we don't see, and knows things that we don't know. Yet, this is another tragedy, and another loss, and that is really difficult to deal with.

My hope at this point, after talking things through with our Director, is that one day, we might be able to obtain a CPAP machine. CPAP stands for Continuous Positive Airway Pressure. CPAP helps premature babies with their breathing, but it is much less invasive than a ventilator. We believe that if we had a CPAP machine, and were properly trained to use it, we could save the lives of many babies, like Peter, whose only problem was that his lungs were not developed enough to enable him to survive outside of the womb.

I am praying that someone will donate a CPAP machine and come to show us how and when to use it very soon.